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Wednesday, September 9, 2009


Well Sam left on deployment again yesterday. He should be gone about the same amount of time as last time. I am doing ok right now. I had my moments yesterday. So far, my whole 36 hours since he has been gone has been a lot harder then last time. I think it had a lot to do with last time I went to Utah (home) right after he left and I live there the whole time he was deployed. This time around I am here at our house without him and everything reminds me he is not coming home for awhile. Plus Gwen and Gilbert are a year older now and they very a ware that Daddy is not home and they can speak it this time a round. Yesterday was really hard on them. I/we tried to explain it to them a couple of days before. But it was no big deal to them then. Yesterday when Daddy went on his ship and Gilbert put it together he started to ball!! It was so sad. He kept yelling "Daddy come down", "Daddy come here", "I want my daddy". He was crying from that moment until ship started to pulled away. He was still crying when it was pulling out but as much. Gwen cryed a couple of times but nothing compare to Gilbert. She was more mad then anything. It was a tough day on both of them. I started to cry a little bit to when I ship pulled away. How I finally got Gilbert to stop crying is that I told him daddy is coming back! He will come home after Christmas. He is actually come home WAY after Christmas but it was the only thing I could think of at the time. But I think that helped that I told daddy wasn't leaving forever, that he was going to come home.

These are of Sam saying goodbye

When we got home is when I really lost it. Just being home without him and knowing he was coming though the door in a couple of day just did me in. What was cute was Gilbert was the one that came over and gave me hug and kisses on my checks, like I did for him. At one point he took my tissue and wiped away a tear I had missed. He made my day.

Gwenith and Gilbert both have mentioned daddy a handful of times today. They know he is on his ship. They tell me they missed him and I let them know I miss him too!

Those are Gwen and Gilbert "daddy bears". We got them when Sam deployed last year. Sam put a recording in the paw of each bears telling them that daddy loves and he will be home soon. This year we de-stuffed and washed them, then went we went to build-a-bear got re-stuffed and put another recording in the other paw of each bear, so now they both have two each. That way they can hear daddy's voice anytime they want

Gwen and Gilbert watch daddy's ship leave


Twincerely,Olga said...

Wow! beautiful post! I am thankful for all your husband is doing for our country.It must be so hard!!
Please stop by and say hi

Katie said...

I love the daddy bears. Thank you for your great blog, and Thank you to your family for serving our country.

The Schneider Family said...

Wow! I dont think I would have kept it together. I think you are amazing and I am too thankful for all your husband is doing for our country.Since having the twins, I have depended ALOT ALOT on my hubby, so I bet this is hard. I dont know you, but reading your post tells me you are strong! Your twins are cute!